Pretty Faces
Novice Medaea sur Yvaine, Written by Taryn
Posted on Fri, Jul 30, 2010 19:38 pm
Medaea dragged herself from the pond, failing at any attempt to control the glower that darkened her face. The Accepted assigned to her this session watched her with a blank expression that could have done an Aes Sedai proud. “Well, now we know that nearly drowning doesn’t work.” Her tone could have wringed the water from her clothes and elicited a small quirk of a smile from the Accepted. Six weeks without results and Medaea had grown to know the men and women who had invested their time to help her break her block. Accepted Pala treated Medaea more as a friend than she did a Novice and it sometimes took the sting away from some of her attempts. “Maybe you should try nearly suffocating me?”
“Don’t be silly, Medaea.” Accepted Pala said, though her smile was indulgent rather than perturbed. “And besides, you didn’t drown, I wouldn’t have allowed it.”
“No, you just weighted my skirts and pulled me down.” Long slender fingers wrapped around her ebon tresses and wrung water with a wet splash. Without warning she felt flows wrap around her and draw the water out, leave a large ball of water to fall into the pond. Her mouth firmed with determination. She hadn’t seen the flows but she had to get this block broken. If she could channel at will, she could have taken the water from around herself and drawn it out. Of course, if her block was broken, she doubted she’d have needed to.
“If you hadn’t been a decent swimmer, I wouldn’t have needed to.” Her tone was arch and she turned on her heel. “Come along, we’ll try something else now.” Medaea followed dutifully, biting back any remarks she might make. In private Accepted Pala was familiar with her, but Medaea was sure to maintain proprieties where any might hear. Not out of fear that she would end up in trouble but so that the Accepted received the respect due to her.
With surprise, she was led to the Training Grounds where Accepted Pala waved and greeted a few of the Gaidin and some of the Trainees. Medaea’s feet kicked up dust with each step while they moved at a fast clip across the Grounds to a low, long building that stretched along the edge of hard packed earth. Entering into the building, the air cooled considerably, a comfortable temperature that surprised the Mayener.
“Here we are.” Accepted Pala opened the door to show a man that stood at least another hand above Medaea’s already considerable height, his hair cropped close to his head and a burnished chestnut. He was an exceedingly handsome man and flashed Medaea a pleased smile when she entered. “Trainee Amiri, this is Novice Medaea. “
“Greetings.” His smile turned warmer and he bowed over her hand, brushing his lips against her knuckles. “A beautiful name for a beautiful woman.”
Medaea looked to Accepted Pala and raised a brow. The only return expression she received was one of very careful neutrality. Very careful. “I have an errand that needs to be attended to, but I’ll meet up with you at High for the midday meal, Novice Medaea.”
Medaea could only stare as the Accepted swept from the room without another word, leaving her speechless to wonder what the woman could possibly be thinking. Why in the Light should she want to spend time with this man? A Trainee who could do absolutely nothing for her? Turning back to the man, she gave him a warm smile; socializing amid emotional distraction was one of the first things she’d mastered as a noble in Mayene. It was a critical skill. “Thank you Trainee Amiri. How shall we spend this time together as newfound acquaintances?”
“We could take a turn about the Gardens and spend luncheon with one another, if this pleases you.”
“Of course.” Medaea smiled and took his offered arm. As they walked she learned about the Bordlerlander. He was Arafellin though a disgrace from his family had caused him to shear his hair and forego the bells that generally adorned the locks. He had been accused of accosting another merchant’s daughter, and although the charges had been cleared of his name, his family had not been able to support him any longer so he had made his way slowly south until he came within sight of Tar Valon. A Gaidin in the city had seen his fighting skills and convinced him to come to train.
“But I’m uncertain if this is my path. Do I want to dedicate my life to serving one woman? Can I?” He shook his head. “I still don’t know, but it’s at least something to bide my time until it feels right or I decide I have to move on.”
Medaea listened attentively as he continued to speak of his own life, taking no opportunity ask about her or how she had come to the Tower. He was much like her husband—self absorbed in his own life and seeing her only as a pretty object to latch onto his arm. As they approached a small secluded area, Accepted Pala stepped into view, basket in her arms. “How was your walk?”
She glanced to Trainee Amiri to see him smiling with a wide open expression. “Novice Medaea has been most agreeable and we had a very pleasant talk.”
Accepted Pala’s smile widened, though Medaea couldn’t say why. “Has she now? Well, she has always been properly sociable when the situation calls for it, please—let’s sit and enjoy the last days of summer with a picnic.”
Medaea sank down onto the grass and spent the remainder of the afternoon speaking with Accepted Pala and Amiri. As the remainder of their food disappear, Accepted Pala turned to Medaea. “Envision the rosebud, Medaea. Let’s see what comes of this.”
With Amiri sitting there watching with bored curiosity, Medaea closed her eyes and imagined the rosebud as she had in so many other exercises. Drawing in a deep breath and letting it exhale from her in an even pattern, she thought of the rosebud. Each petal was wound tight and drawn upon itself, the veins striking and yet subdued in each little petal. She imagined the curve of the bud and how its conical shape strained to release and expand. She desired to release and expand, to open herself up to the sunlight that must be pulsing from the other side. She let each layer unfurl slowly, drawing open to the sunshine that should be there.
Uttering an oath, Medaea opened her eyes and shook her head. “No. Distracting me with pretty faces doesn’t break my block.”
The Accepted let another more vehement oath cross her lips. “I was certain that Trainee Amiri would break it.”
Medaea glanced to the Trainee who still regarded her with eyes that saw her as an object and nothing more. And suddenly saidar was just over her shoulder, calling her with the crooning siren’s song. Just a touch of the Power and he wouldn’t see her like that anymore—no. No. “The only thing he brings is a misplaced arrogance in his own importance and he only helps us succeed by fulfilling my requirements.”
The Accepted’s face flushed as she glanced to the Trainee, her mouth formed in an “O”. Shaking herself, the Accepted looked to Amiri; the Trainee merely looked perplexed by whatever Medaea had said. Just a reinforcement of her opinion of the vacuous and self-centered Trainee. “Thank you for your assistance, Amiri.” The Trainee looked at her a long moment and then flashed a smile to Medaea before bowing and excusing himself.
“You felt absolutely nothing?” Accepted Pala asked, her eyes intent.
Medaea looked to her and shook her head. “Only a sense of revulsion.”
Accepted Pala laughed.
In reply to Head Full of Wine[show]/[hide]
Her lids dragged heavily and a blink took seconds. A month of working with different Accepted, Aes Sedai and even the occasional Asha’man every day in addition to her chores and lessons were taking its toll. Circles shadowed her eyes after getting little more than two hours of sleep before an Aes Sedai entered her room and woke her. A month of trying every trick that they knew and Medaea still was no closer to breaking through her block, though it was not for lack of effort on the White Tower’s or her part. She’d been pinched, prodded, frightened, swatted, calmed, soothed and dozens of different things.
For the past half week they—any of three different Aes Sedai—had been waking her in the middle of the night and dragging her into various rooms and plying her with food until she was stuffed or having open and casual conversation about the Aes Sedai’s life (this had opened her eyes wide to hear some of the things the Sister had done while in Whites), and sometimes they would just sit and make her relax, which often resulted in being jolted awake by the slapping of a slipper to the ground.
Today it was mealtime and she was in the private quarters of a Blue Sister that had participated in on her block breaking sessions regularly. Nedani Sedai was a tall and beautiful Domani woman, slender with the willowy build that seemed typical to their people. She poured a glass of wine for Medaea, and the Mayener looked up to the Aes Sedai in surprise. “Wine, Aes Sedai? Am I allowed that as a Novice?”
The Sister’s smile was restrained yet amused. “Your problem is that you like to be in control, Medaea. Your block only dissipates when you want to control someone. Surrendering control in order to channel saidar doesn’t come naturally to you. Your control is tight and well maintained so we’re going to try and drop that control you have over yourself with an entirely different tactic.”
Medaea’s eyes went to the wineglass and she couldn’t stop them from widening. “You’re going to get me drunk.”
“Ourel was right—you have a quick mind. And you apply it diligently I hear, not a wasted moment, not a Novice that lets herself become distracted by anything else.” Nedani Sedai’s smile slipped slightly and in its place was an expression Medaea recognized. The predatory look of someone wanting something. “You are still young to the Tower at only five months, but the Blue Ajah may find your ambition and intelligence a keen asset to our Ajah. For now, drink.”
It was a heady and full-bodied Tairen Red that warmed her as it slipped down to her stomach. In Mayene she had consumed wine at meals, but in the White Tower their drinks were watered and more often punch than wine. She never cared for reds unless it was with a meal—they were too dry and it made her mouth get a film over it. But the Blue Sister was going to try and loosen her control with drink and she’d promised to go through whatever methods they attempted with her, so she drank the wine. And she drank, and then drank some more. All the while the Domani Aes Sedai told amusing stories of her life as a merchant’s daughter and her foibles before coming to the Tower as a Novice.
At first the stories didn’t seem so amusing, they got some mild laughter, but as each cup was consumed during their conversation, Medaea found each one getting funnier. “…And I told her ‘But I thought you were a man!’”
Medaea’s laughter was loud and nearly cackling as she just barely kept herself from rolling out of the chair. When did the floor get so wobbly? She was so. Bloody. Tired. Why in the Light was this woman keeping her up? Oh, good more wine, she was still thirsty after all. Taking a big gulp of the liquid, it barely burned as it went down her throat, but the pleasant floating sensation of her arms reminded her very much of the lessons that Accepted Sorcha took them through to try and channel. “So…” She squinted slightly as the image of the Aes Sedai went out of focus. “Sooo, do you get every Novice drunk just so we—so we have, ah blood and ashes, I forgot what I was flaming going to say.”
The Blue Sister smiled, or at least Medaea thought the woman was smiling but was that a smirk? Nah, Aes Sedai didn’t smirk, not at Novices or anyone else. They were so bloody cool and collected. And that was so impressive! The fact that they were in control of their emotions each and every second fascinated her and she wanted to be like that without being bloody called down for being an ice cold wench. Wretched man! Who did he think he was? She’d show him! When he was old and gray and dying, she’d come and see him with her ageless face and not a single gray in her hair and show him! Huh, the Aes Sedai was speaking and then all the sudden—“Hey! I was still drinking that!”
“I think that you’ve finally had enough, Novice Medaea. Now I’m sure that it will be difficult for you to concentrate, but let’s try to get you to embrace saidar. Picture the rosebud in your mind…” Nedani Sedai’s voice was a soft drone in the buzzing of her ears and she closed her eyes.
“Novice Medaea, wake up!”
Her eyes flew open and she felt the thrill of fear course through her veins even as her head began spinning. Nedani Sedai’s face was a thundercloud but she couldn’t help but start laughing at the stern expression on the woman’s face. “I’m so sorry…so sorry Aes Sedai. I’m just so tired and then the wine it’s just making me more tired. And you had me close my eyes.” The woman’s lips pressed together and even through the haze of the wine, Medaea knew the Sister was not pleased. Light, she didn’t snore did she? She hoped not, how embarrassing. “All right, I’ll try again, no sleeping, promise.”
She closed her eyes and tried to envision the rosebud, but it was hard. It kept spinning out of her mind’s eye along with her body feeling like it was going to spin right to the floor. Who thought this was a good idea? She didn’t. And why was her mouth so bloody dry and covered in film? Oh, yes the wine. The rosebud! Frantically bringing her focus back to the rosebud, Medaea envisioned it, went through the exercises that worked when there was someone nearby that she wanted to manipulate but when she opened herself, the light simply wasn’t there. It was as if she couldn’t channel at all. A trickle of a tear rolled down her cheek as violet blue eyes opened to look at the Aes Sedai. “It didn’t work. I can’t sense it no matter how I try.”
The Blue Sister gave a very soft sigh and nodded once, drawing Medaea up with a supporting arm. “I had hoped, it seemed so certain that this would be the one to break your block. Let’s get you into your bed and I’ll cancel your morning classes tomorrow.”
Medaea wrenched herself away from the Aes Sedai. “No! No, Aes Sedai! No special treatment—I’ll be up to do my chores with everyone else.” In a moment the fog of wine was cleared from her mind and she stood her ground to the Blue Sister with an adamant expression on her face, jaw clenched and eyes flashing defiance.
“Novice Medaea, we’ve been watching you run yourself ragged this past month. Not a single woman in the Tower is going to think any less of you for taking a couple extra hours to finally rest and sleep off what we just put you through.” The stern expression on Nedani’s face had been replaced with compassion and her eyes were on level with Medaea’s to look into them with earnest honesty.
“I know, Aes Sedai. But I asked for this and I want to break my block but I can’t do that if I let myself take even a small break.” Medaea shook her head. “Not everything earned and achieved comes easy—most times it comes with weariness, effort and some pain. Thank you for the offer of cancelling my chores and classes, Aes Sedai, but I’ll rest when my block is broken.” At that moment the weight of the wine and her own fatigue caught up to her and she stumbled against the wall before catching herself. The Aes Sedai moved to help her but Medaea shook her head and forced her legs straight once more. She would give up when her block was broken or she collapsed into a deep sleep.
Nedani Sedai’s face was inscrutable as she met Medaea’s gaze, but Medaea could see the small glint of approval in the woman’s eyes, a respect that she had earned this night even with a head full of wine.
